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This morning I was in the kitchen scrambling some eggs. I was using a wooden spoon.Me - "Yes."
Ruthi - "Oh! I thought you just use wooden spoons for spanking!"
The odd thing is, she has seen me use a wooden spoon for cooking LOTS of times, and she has used it herself for stirring while helping me in the kitchen as well.
Not sure why she is just now asking that!
Especially since spankings have been a lot more rare lately. Thankfully!
Are you a fan of Dr James Dobson, by any chance?
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Well, I never thought of it as being a fan, but yes, I like Dr. Dobson very much! He definitely has helped me know better how to handle strong willed children!
ReplyDeleteSometimes I love Dr Dobson, sometimes I have him. I really like the attitude of making sure that your child knows you love him especially when you punish him, and that he knows that any punishment you give him is because you love him. I'm not so sure that I'm so into his corporal punishment ideas, especially not using a spoon to give a spanking, but I understand why he says what he does and i can understand that not every kid is so easy going and sometimes you need a stricter approach than just soft words.
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I don't know of anyone I agree with everything on, but most of what he says, I do. Maybe because of the way I was raised. As far as spanking, I only do it when necessary - if something else works, I do it instead. My husband and I were both spanked and raised to be healthy, respectful indviduals. I do believe there is a fine line between spanking and abusing. As far as using a spoon, well, I was spanked with a belt and learned the "hard" way that it isn't as easily controlled. So for me, personally, I like the spoon, because I can completly contol it, only land on the bottom, and don't spank harder than I intended. That's my preference. Thankfully, I don't have to spank very often at all. But sometimes, it is the only thing that works for my daughter. My son is 15, so I certainly don't spank him now - it would be pointless. But he received his share growing up, and is a very respectable young man. I think, for parents who can discipline successfully without spanking, that is great. I prefer not to spank, but as I said, there are sometimes it is the only thing that works. I never spank when I'm angry though - and have taken a time out for myself to cool off before I proceed. Things are very calm when a spanking is necessary, and is followed up by prayer, repentance and hugs and kisses. Thankfully, as I said though, spankings are more and more rare now days.
ReplyDeleteJennifer, I have been away helping with my in-laws in another state
ReplyDeleteJennifer, I have been away helping with my in-laws in another state and with no DSL!!!
When I saw this post, I just knew that it would raise eyebrows as spanking is such a controversial subject.
I was abused as a child and I spank with a wooden spoon also. There is no "fine line" between spanking as a proper discipline and abuse; there is a huge chasm and the only reason I use a spoon is because my spankings by hand did not sting enough to make the point, particularly through jeans.
The arguments against spanking I understand, but I have a strong-willed child, the obvious off-spring of her two strong-willed parents. My daughter is the most like me, so I understand her very well. I make sure she feels she has been heard, but I also explain to her that it is my responsibility to my Lord to be sure I discipline her so that she understands the difference between right and wrong, and even when she is sorry for what she has done, there are consequences for doing wrong. As much as I dislike spanking her, it is effective in helping her make better choices about her behavior.
My daughter often tells me, when she sees children acting with disrespect towards their parents and others, that they act like that because their parents don't spank them--her father and I do not say things like that, it is her own idea.
I was just reading Dobson's Strong Willed Child yesterday. I am not a big spanker, mostly because I tend to want to do it when I am angry and in the moment. That being said, we are a "spanking" household- I think sometimes it is necessary when no other form of punishment seems to make the point.
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